#Messy: It's what's trending

Messy:
1. characterized by a dirty, untidy, or disordered condition: a messy room.
2. causing a mess: a messy recipe; messy work.
3. embarrassing, difficult, or unpleasant: a messy political situation.
4. characterized by moral or psychological confusion.
Via Dictionary.com (Based on the Random House Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2010.)

It's 2010. A new decade. A few months ago we were all making resolutions. Proclaiming that this would be "our" year. So many people made affirmations and swore to themselves that this would be the year of no drama. The year of maturity. The year of growth. I think it's safe to say that mission failed....epically.

Turn on the TV, flip to the nearest reality show or drama (the genre says it all) I guarantee you will not be surprised with what you see. Bad Girls Club showcases some of the messiest females I've ever seen.  Cat fight after cat fight.  And the word "bitch" is thrown around like a frisbee in a dog park.  The Wendy Williams Show thrives on the messiest gossip and brings on some of the messiest guests.  We get to see clips from shows like Real Housewives of Atlanta and we hear about who Larry King is sleeping with and how it all went down.  If there were no drama in Hollywood, that show (and shows like it) would fizzle and die.

Everywhere we turn is drama, drama, drama. For some reason there is a global obsession with all things messy. From Facebook statuses to the nightly news, if there’s no drama, it’s just not interesting. If a woman isn’t calling another woman a bitch or a hoe; if a guy isn’t talking about all his haters; if girls aren’t being catty and having the most ignorant fights over a man; if someone’s not breaking their vows, it’s not worth paying attention to. This is a BIG problem and here are a couple of reasons why:

1. Children copy EVERYTHING. There’s these things we call kids and we’re supposed to be these things we call adults. Immaturity, games, and lack of wisdom are things for children. And because adults are SUPPOSED to be the mature and wise ones, children emulate all that we do. What if a 6 year old girl is flipping through the channels and sees a clip of one of these reality shows featuring ignorant, promiscuous women fighting for the “love” of some C-list celebrity? Chances are, they might be exposed to this messy behavior and they will more than likely copy it in one shape or form, even if it’s just once. When my niece was 4, she was talking about how Elmo was her baby’s dad and wouldn’t take care of the kids. It may sound funny, but it is a serious problem. Somewhere in the back of her head, she thought that was ok, the norm. And when children get that in their head early on, it’s a recipe for disaster.

2. We become DESENSITIZED. If all we see is drama and BS, eventually it’s just not going to bother us anymore. Think about it. All that we see is petty fights, messy situations, and drama. So when those things enter our own life, we just shrug it off when we really need to pay attention and stay away from such things. There’s not enough shock value. When we hear that our friend got into a fight with her son’s father and he wrecked her car because she called him a bitch, we should be left in awe. Now-a-days all we can really do is say, “I believe it.” And people cheat so often that it NEVER surprises me. I hear, “Girl, do you know that Tommy slept with Tammy’s best friend?” All I can do is say, "oh well." It’s all over the media. Everyone from A-list celebrities to local politicians are making infidelity the “in” thing. This means people are going to keep cheating and keep allowing people to cheat on them. Sometimes we need that shock value to keep us from allowing things to happen.  We need to be shocked when we see women degrading each other.  We need to be shocked when we see folks curse out the parents of their children.  If we're not, it will just keep on happening.

So knowing that absorbing all this messiness is a problem, why perpetuate it?  Why are so many people glued to the TV and/or broadcasting their messy situations on Facebook and Twitter?  It's the thing to do I guess.  Everyone from high schoolers to folks in their 40s, hell some even older than that are embracing the messy way of life.  If you're not into dramatics, cattiness, and the sort, you're just not cool.  I want to challenge everyone (myself included) to ignore miessiness.  Let's have a Messy Boycott. Stop commenting on people's statuses is they air their dirty laundry online.  Stop watching these ignorant show because all you're doing is sending the ratings through the roof.  If we stop promoting this type of behavior, maybe it would cease to exist. (Wishful thinking)

Disclaimer:  I have had my messy moments.  Who hasn't?  :-)